Monday, February 14, 2011

Day 45: You too Google?!

One of the first things I did this morning was take a dook (a great way to start the holiday I think is total shit), and began dreading the inevitable and insufferable presence of Valentine's Day.

Maybe I'm jealous of others that are in relationships. Maybe I'm jaded after years of elementary school in which I had to provide a card for every person in class (remember those lame days of walking around the class room depositing a card onto everyone's desk?). Maybe I am just looking to tear down an institution.

Why, I have to ask, is Valentine's Day so valued? Why is it that throughout an entire year, a man can pass on so many better opportunities to show their love and devotion, but all is seemingly forgiven as long as they remember Valentine's Day? Does it matter so much to observe this day? With a card? A dozen roses? How about a box of chocolates?

Wouldn't it be more appreciated to receive a dozen roses on, say....March 3rd? How about May 13th? Wouldn't it be better to receive a small token of love on a day that has no significance?

Also, if you're going to do a romantically small gesture, do it with some personality. Don't buy a fuckin' card. There's enough pre-packaged shit out there you're going to end up buying each other anyway.

Hand write a beautiful letter on some nice stationary. Rewrite a poem that makes you think of said loved one, because maybe you can't think of the words yourself (but handmade gifts are more thoughtful than a fuckin' card). Make the card from construction paper and other odd materials. Pick up some flowers - roses or whatever might striker her/his fancy - but deliver them in a more clever way, if you can think of one.

Better yet! Why not let them walk into the house/apartment to you cleaning the shit out of the place (rooms cleaned, floors mopped, dishes done and so on), food in the oven, a candle or two burning and then (finally then) wishing her a Happy Valentine's Day? Of course, you can do this any day of the year and have it be just as, if not more, meaningful (withhold the Valentine's Day greetings).

Adding to the odd significance of the day is the more acutely felt devastation of being "dumped" on or near Valentine's Day. Does it matter any more if you're dropped a week after, months before or any other day of the year? You still got dropped like third period Spanish!! The end result is the same, and it's only because of the meaning it has been given, which you hold to, that it's as painful as YOU make it out to be. Wouldn't it be even shittier to be dropped a few days after the day? Then you know that in spite of being given a gift, that person was planning to drop you anyway?

Okay, this is a rant and most people won't like it or even agree, or are too shallow to admit they do like or agree with it. I'm done with the bitching...

Don't think that Andy has given up on love, or doesn't have a romantic side. In fact, I really miss feeling "in love" with a special lady friend. I want to feel that love again, but wanting it so strongly, I feel it necessary to be more wary of it, lest I settle for something easier and less perfect.


  1. And for the record, I will still give gifts to people, but with a more friendly intent rather than intimate devotion.

  2. Well said Andy.... Its just another Hallmark Holiday. I could care less about the candy, cards or flowers. A nice gesture, I love you or hug suits me just fine. My husband and I don't celebrate Valentine's Day or Sweetest Day and I don't feel any less loved because of it.

  3. WELL. SAID. I despise this "holiday" as well. Like you, I don't know if it's because no one (other than my mother and grandmother - how sad is that) gave a fat fuck about me EVER for Valentine's when I was younger. By the time I got Phil, I hated it so much that I basically banned it - along with "Sweetest Day." SWEETEST DAY?!?!? REALLY?!?!? W.T.F.

    I'm with ya, Andy - I would much rather have him surprise me any other random day of the year with something special...dinner, a pink carnation...even a damn dandelion than get anything on this made up bullshit hallmark holiday.

  4. Well then in that case, would you rather not celebrate christmas and/thanksgiving? Because after all, we should be observant of their purposes all year 'round.

  5. ...i didnt mean not that we shouldn't celebrate it, but specifically to those days

  6. Thanksgiving, the philosophical import behind anyway, should be observed the year 'round. Not the day. The day is a historical farce. It only reminds us of how good of Christians our ancestors were and how noble we were to the very same Indians we raped, killed, and stole from.

    Celebrate Christmas for what it is, and as a Yule holiday tradition, to which I'm not opposed. The attitudes of people around Black Friday and surrounding the commercialism associated with Christmas that I hate. It seems an oxymoron of sorts when you have non-Christians celebrating Christmas.

    I'm not opposed to V-Day either, but from what I have witness over the years; through female friends confiding in me, hearing via my sisters complain, and being aware of the historical trend of advertising that was initiated Candy Companies & Floral shops (etc..) during the late 40's and early 50's, I must on principle oppose the idea. Why, I have to ask is it so important to observe love on this day? Why should it mean more than other day? Because your girlfriend's Jane got something and thinks it's shitty that you didn't get your girlfriend something? What does that say about your girlfriend? Materialistic in the same way that conniving women bitch about the sizes of engagement ring diamonds?