Day 59: Totally Nerdcore!!!

Yeah, this is such a bad pic of me, but oh well. This shot was chosen for two reasons. The primary reason being I was just a lazy damn turd yesterday, and can justify it by saying this shot was officially taken on Sunday, just past midnight.

The girl's name is Casey, and she's a waitress at Bone Island Grille. Cute? Very much so, but made infinitely more cute with those glasses on. So cute in fact, if she were my girlfriend and wanted to wear those glasses all day every day, I'd support her in her decision.

I don't really have a type, per say, but I have things that rev my motor. Chuck Taylor All Star shoes, for example, will always turn me on when worn by a cutie. Throw a choice vanilla scent on that girl, then we might have a rape case on our hands.

Seriously, sometimes fashion, hobbies, personality flaws....as much as physical attributes can make the girl hot in my eyes. The words she uses while talking can slay me. Is she a nerd? Does she like Star Wars or comics or a particular video game for example? Doesn't matter....could be that she digs on playing Monopoly....

I don't really even fall victim to desiring of physical body types. Sure, a body might look good in a bikini, but that has no bearing on sexual ability or the ability to rock my socks off.

God heaven forbid I find myself bored in a conversation with a girl. You can be the hottest thing since the surface of the sun, but if you bore the shit out of me, I'll never risk mixing my genetic code with yours.

Day 58: Why'd I do a fool thing like this?

January 24, 2008 I signed out of the Army, and within an hour of signing out, I had my ass in a barbershop ready to do something stupid: get a mohawk. It was either the 'hawk or smoke enough weed to kill the entire population or Rhode Island. I just happened to choose the more legal option.

There have been times when I mention doing something stupid - get a mohawk or a new tattoo or something else - much to the chagrin of my mother. She asks "why would you do something like that," or "why would you want to look like a dumb kid with stupid hair?" She'll never get it.

It's part of release of stress perhaps. To throw up a middle finger to the situation before that is causing me serious mental drama. Knowing that whether I adhere closely to the rules or not won't really hinder me. Even if it does make things harder by breaking the norm, at least I know it's of my own design.

Day 57: Man Who Pees A Lot

Alright, I love my boy Bill a.k.a. Buffcock a.k.a. Billy Reuben....but the man was brought into this world with a genetic anomaly of a small bladder. Abnormally small....

Ya' never have to worry about being the first one to go to the bathroom, because he will probably beat you to it. Which is all cool, but it's pretty funny when people become aware of it for the first time, and the person in question the night this shot was taken is my object of molten lust, Molly Mounds a.k.a. Jen Datte. hehe

I drink an ass ton of water throughout the day and still piss less than this. Even makes me worry that I have kidney problems sometimes.

Where I tend to feel the urge to drop serious fluids is immediately prior to a movie at the theater. Never fail...I can fast for days on end, avoid even thinking about fluids and sit down to a movie and just as the theater dims, I've got to race like a damn piss horse! Ya' think I was a damn pregnant woman as often as I feel the urge in that situation.

At least it's not often that I get the urge to drop a major dook prior to watching a movie. It's problematic being comfortable enough to take a shit in there as is, and what if it's an extra runny shit? I hate excessive wiping with cheap TP. Then you're faced with two situations - well I'm faced with them...either feeling like I didn't wipe well enough or that I ran something barely soften than sand paper through my cheeks, and I'm sure we all have an idea how rough it feels when you irritate that area.

Day 56: Fresh from the Needle

You (should) know what this is, assuming you follow me and my exploits.

Day 55: Star of the Sea's Backside

Overcast skies make for a dim photo, especially from a distance. I wish I had a much better camera with a super-duper zoom lens to get even closer, to one of the towers perhaps. The sky probably would have made the shot dim anyway :/

Something I tell myself is that if I can keep up with the project long enough - six months or the whole year - I'll pick myself out a new camera. Something more capable and able to capture some incredible images, but also nothing too high end.

Since I'm just a piddly amateur with a mild - more than mild - interest in photography, anything more than an entry level DSLR would be overkill and a waste. I've got my eye on Canon Rebel's, but I'll keep looking around. Might be a good idea to check out a few books from the library; books on photography and so on. Perhaps even look into taking a class that will keep me task oriented and consistently learning the art.

The next year will become another project of 52 weeks. With a photo a week, and some focus behind the shot. I'd like to do that now, but I don't have the time or equipment to really expand my focus/development.

Day 54: A work in progress.....

Kinda buggin' me I can't get the pic to lay horizontal. :/

More to come later....maybe tomorrow :D

Day 53: Who else could use one of these?

I could use one of these on a daily basis; how 'bout you?

The aroma of coffee has always been a wonderful thing, but it's never been something I've been a fan of ingesting. Believe me, I'd try to learn to love it, but no such luck. By the time I'd put enough milk into the coffee it'd be better described by saying "how much coffee would you like in your milk?"

Eventually, I started transitioning over from lattes and such to strict coffee, though I usually end up with at least a little cream in my brew. Should the establishment be in possession of whip cream, I will totally indulge in a little extra fat-boy-ness. The people who server me most often will usually get smacked if they even have to ask if I want whip cream.

Day 52: Late Night Snow

Jake Dunn and company can suck my butt! I can wait for Spring, not that I really have a choice. I do have the choice, however, to be tired of this stuff we call snow. Shorts, sandals, motorcycles fill my current thoughts. I want to go camping and go to the lake and not be cold at Cascades and sit out on patios at local restaurants.

*sigh*.....I'll wait....

Shoot! I almost forgot to add in description of the photo.

Throughout the day I had been taking photos of the weather's visible side. Late at night, I snapped this shot. I like how everything else is in darkness and the only visible things are those that reflected the flash.

Day 51: Big Sister is Watching You!

Someone else took this photo, and I thought it pretty cool. I'm hoping they don't develop any cancer from the repeated flashes to their eye (for the record, they did it of their own accord).

Day 50: Newsboy from Hell

While I keep the story writing to a minimum here, I just want to show off Wayne's 'stache. He's quite a character around town, and without it he looks like a child barely old enough to grow one. He's a pretty cool cat though, so nothing but love for him.

Taken at the Town Bar, and it was preceded by an almost-fight earlier in the evening.

First and foremost, I find it interesting to size up other people getting ready to fight. Hopefully it's not me about to be in the fight, but it's even more crucial at that point.

So...in an effort to size the opponents up:

On one side, we have a couple or preppy, drunk bitches actin' asses all around. Several of them rang the bell (which means you're buying drinks all around) - repeatedly - with no intention of buying drinks for anyone beyond themselves. After being told repeatedly by the aging waitress to get out or stop dancing on a table, one of that party had to be pulled off said table by a few of her less inebriated friends. Quite a belligerent woman, but of course, she was emboldened buy the drink, as were many of her friends.

On the other side, we have a crew of people sharing one thing in common: they are heavily tattooed, which tells me they have a certain tolerance of pain. Two of them are the owners of the tattoo shop sitting less than a block away, and are pretty slow to anger people (which is something you always consider as it's usually these people that are more of a threat). Also in this group is the owner and athlete of Jackson's own Jacktown Rollers Dirby team, a girl I know from High School who is buff looking as well as pretty damn tall. Her boyfriend and several other friends also in attendance. Not to mention, they're known locals and frequently can be found at this bar.

Hometown advantage is obvious, and with that status of being locals comes with the knowledge that there are more than a few other patrons who will jump on their side, on principle. Also a consideration is that they're well known to the bar owners as regular and respectable patrons; because of this, they're not going to be considered as the likely cause of the fight.

A funnier aspect of the incident? At one point, my friend asked me in a voice filled with mild awe, "Andy, whose side are we on?"

Day 49: Vicious Vernicious

I'm starting to include too many of the dog, but this was another I just had to include!! Mid-yawn, and I didn't expect to capture it.

More story telling will be forthcoming. I've been busy and tired of late, but not brain dead. Less than a week and half before Spring Break, during which I'll be headed to Chicago for a day and some change, and by then I'll have a cornucopia of thoughts to share!

Yes, I used "cornucopia."

Day 48: SPRING IS COMING!

With a recent heat wave destroying much of the snow around town, I'm starting to feel excitement that Spring is not too far away. Doesn't mean much in a city that has seen blizzards as late as Easter, but that's unlikely. This whole week I've been able to dress a little lighter and forget the gloves and ear protection. It's so wonderful!!

Who else is ready for Spring? ;)

Day 47: What in thee helllllllll?!

Let it be said that the column on the right and in the center are parked within marked parking spaces. The column on the left, however, are not within marked spaces.

This is one of those cases where I'd walk out, see a driver of one of the trapped center cars keying the car on the left, and I'd walk away. Walk away or join in, not completely sure. Hell....I'd even claim "your honoriferous, we was at the movies togedder." Think he'd buy that as an airtight alibi?

I don't even care to listen to an explanation here. I'd just as soon walk my ass back and forth, stabbing tires, breaking mirrors and cutting break lines; all sorts of treacherous and hell bent vandalism. Quite rightly I'd give them one hell of a horrorshow the likes of Alex and his droogies would consider ghastly.

THEN.....I'd find the owners of the cars on the left and being doing all sorts of sinister things to them. Rip out their toe nails, and shove salty french fries in the stumpy digits where their nails once were. Peel their eyelids as far apart as I could without ripping them clean off, and bashing the back of their heads attempting to make their eyes pop right out.

*eyes gleam greedily and with intense erotic bloodlust*

AFTER ALL THAT!!!!!! I would push one eye back in, and torture their loved family members in front of them (all the while recording it so in case they turn away from the carnage, I can cut off their torn eyelid and make the watch it over and over again).

Okay, maybe I wouldn't do all that, but I won't negate the possibility of it happening. More likely than not, I'd punch them in the baby making bits to ensure that they never contribute to a dumber gene pool from which our world already suffers.

In all seriousness, I am very forgiving of many things, but this was a large scale act of stupidity.

Day 46: Downtown Building

Stepping out of the Coffee Co Monday, El Buffcock brought attention to this building, which neither of us knew what the building's purpose was. Does anyone know what's in there?

Day 45: You too Google?!

One of the first things I did this morning was take a dook (a great way to start the holiday I think is total shit), and began dreading the inevitable and insufferable presence of Valentine's Day.

Maybe I'm jealous of others that are in relationships. Maybe I'm jaded after years of elementary school in which I had to provide a card for every person in class (remember those lame days of walking around the class room depositing a card onto everyone's desk?). Maybe I am just looking to tear down an institution.

Why, I have to ask, is Valentine's Day so valued? Why is it that throughout an entire year, a man can pass on so many better opportunities to show their love and devotion, but all is seemingly forgiven as long as they remember Valentine's Day? Does it matter so much to observe this day? With a card? A dozen roses? How about a box of chocolates?

Wouldn't it be more appreciated to receive a dozen roses on, say....March 3rd? How about May 13th? Wouldn't it be better to receive a small token of love on a day that has no significance?

Also, if you're going to do a romantically small gesture, do it with some personality. Don't buy a fuckin' card. There's enough pre-packaged shit out there you're going to end up buying each other anyway.

Hand write a beautiful letter on some nice stationary. Rewrite a poem that makes you think of said loved one, because maybe you can't think of the words yourself (but handmade gifts are more thoughtful than a fuckin' card). Make the card from construction paper and other odd materials. Pick up some flowers - roses or whatever might striker her/his fancy - but deliver them in a more clever way, if you can think of one.

Better yet! Why not let them walk into the house/apartment to you cleaning the shit out of the place (rooms cleaned, floors mopped, dishes done and so on), food in the oven, a candle or two burning and then (finally then) wishing her a Happy Valentine's Day? Of course, you can do this any day of the year and have it be just as, if not more, meaningful (withhold the Valentine's Day greetings).

Adding to the odd significance of the day is the more acutely felt devastation of being "dumped" on or near Valentine's Day. Does it matter any more if you're dropped a week after, months before or any other day of the year? You still got dropped like third period Spanish!! The end result is the same, and it's only because of the meaning it has been given, which you hold to, that it's as painful as YOU make it out to be. Wouldn't it be even shittier to be dropped a few days after the day? Then you know that in spite of being given a gift, that person was planning to drop you anyway?

Okay, this is a rant and most people won't like it or even agree, or are too shallow to admit they do like or agree with it. I'm done with the bitching...

Don't think that Andy has given up on love, or doesn't have a romantic side. In fact, I really miss feeling "in love" with a special lady friend. I want to feel that love again, but wanting it so strongly, I feel it necessary to be more wary of it, lest I settle for something easier and less perfect.

Day 44: A Precious *sniff* Item

Several weeks ago, one of my English 132 classmates turned to me and said, "if you sniff one more time I'm going to kill you."

Sometime last fall, I walked into the testing center of the JCC library to polish off a test. Seeing two very lovely friends of mine, I decided to have a little bit O' fun. Before sitting down, I began sniffling purposefully (it would have happened regardless). After shuffling to my seat, all the while keeping my eyes on my two friends, who were by this time vibrating with contained laughter, I decided to play a little bit more.

Now frequently I would move the keyboard and monitor out of the way of the desk, since the two things were often in the exact center of the desk. Knowing full well there would be an audible noise, a squeak that I know my friends, currently hyper sensitive to any sounds originating from my direction, would hear. I had not planned on the level of volume that moving the monitor would spit forth that day.

Pushing the monitor back and up, coming from somewhere deep within the bowels of it's joints, there was a high pitched squeak that was something akin to the whore of Babylon screeching out in unholy, orgasmic ecstacy.

Unlike nails going down a chalkboard, or that sound of nylons being ripped open (which can be a good thing depending on the situation), it wasn't a painful sound at all. It was, however, an attention commanding squeak. In a normally "silent as a grave" room already interrupted by my sniffles, this squeak had everyone's attention. Every single head was either turned towards me or laughing to themselves at the obscene ridiculousness of the situation.

Enough on that though, onto the sniffle spray!

In the past several years, I've found out that I'm allergic to a good amount of whatever: pollen, pet dander, or life in general. No clue what it is, but I work around it. Medications like claritin make it manageable, but every so often, I need something more instantly gratifying. Enter the Sinex/Vicks collabo of a nasal spray.

Day 43: 'Cuz I'm a fat kid!!

Why? 'Cuz I'm fat, that's why!

Yesterday I went to Olive Garden for lunch yesterday with my sister, Heather. Sure, I could turn this into a mushy blog of family stories, but I'd rather it be a fat kid blog.

By fat kid, I don't mean overweight, obese, muffin' top havin', encrusted with stretch marks, more chins than a Chinese phone book kind of fat. I mean that you're the type of person who has fond, fond thoughts of bacon. A type of person who looks at a good piece of cake with longing that is usually found in romance novels. A person whose stomach begins growling at the sight a chili cheese fries or something similar. Someone who adopts a "thousand yard stare" while on a diet. People that spent a year in Iraq, but talk fondly of DFAC 3 (Dining Facility).

DFAC 3 was pretty damn choice, if I say so myself.

Being overweight and being fat is different. Overweight describes a physical state of health; a condition. Being fat is all mental. In that way, you can have a 95lb girl who eats a pound of bacon in a sittin is categorized as a fat girl in my book. A 250lb 30 year old guy who can sit down with a glass of chocolate milk (BAREMAN'S MUTHA FACKOO) and a bowl of cookie dough as an evening snack, yet feels no guilt, is a fat kid. Two different body types, but we're both fat kids in heart and soul.

Really, it boils down to your enjoyment of food. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy salads too, but I really enjoy sitting down to savory dishes, warm dishes that touch deep down to the core. A good plate of lasagna, a bowl of creamy & cheesey potatoe soup, a custard filled long John from Hinkley's can all do this. And they're not alone.....

There are a few people that don't really appear to enjoy food anyway. Not that they don't enjoy eating, but they don't partake in conversations about food. Bring up something delicious, and they'll say "yeah, I like it", but they won't really say it with any passion.

A friend of mine often responds with "that's naughty" after eating something particularly delicious. And I know just what she means.....one fat kid to another, I know.

Day 42: Just couldn't choose!!

A breaking of the rules for one photo per day, but I just couldn't choose between these two! And it doesn't hurt that they're easy on the eyes!

Also helps that they're two of the finest people I know that I have the honor of calling friends.

My glasses are fairly geeky looking, but I dig them. In fact, I dig them so much I like to get photos of other people wearing them. And it amazes me, that I think just about everyone else looks better in my glasses than I do. Fuckers.

Day 41: Random Macro Shot...not that cool

Sittin' my ass in a booth at Jackson Coffee Co, I wondered what sort of photo this would make. While it wasn't that cool, I thought it sort of neat, despite not wanting to get up and position myself better and there being a blur trail.

Day 40: I hate this place....

No, I don't really hate the place at all. It's true that I'm tired of walking these halls, and this place has become a source of less than pleasant stress, but the building and hallways are not to blame.

Day 39: JCo

Jackson Coffee Companty, otherwise known as my "Friday Place of Business", one of the few places in this city I'll miss when I've left for greener pastures.

A funny shot for two reasons. The first being that I wasn't thinking about myself in the photo until after I'd taken it, and because shortly after taking it, someone in the window started waving back.

I'll write more later. Mood is shitty, and I'm in an intense "Fuck the World" mentality.

Day 38: Angela's Semi-Triumphant Return

Angela has been long missing from our gang. One of the original "Bonesmen" from our first semester, she has since fallen ill and life has not been particularly kind. Although she looks pretty damn snazzy in this photo, she has several remaining issues that she still has to deal with before she's tip-top.

That all being acknowledged, it was awesome having an OG Bonesmen in attendance once again!

Day 37: A Gift...

Seems like forever ago, but I remember expressed jealousy and admiration of a friend's handmade scarf. Now, I too have a handmade scarf (WITH FUCKIN' POCKETS BISH)! Not only is it handmade, it's an Original Courney Klatt Kreation!!

This scarf gives me just one more reason to love that girl. Imagine me opening an overloaded closet filled with mountains of stuff....that stuff represents the reasons to love her. 'Nuff said.

Day 36: Beans & Beans...Coffee Beans...

*RAWR*

If that doesn't make any sense to you, then perhaps this will.

"Giggity"

Day 35: The Love Tat (not really)

This was a late night pic from Thursday, and I decided to use it as it marks a significant milestone to me; that I'm actually considering a tattoo below my elbow. Never in my life have I actually wanted or been serious about tattoos passing below my elbows, even if there have been times when I have semi-wanted to start planning a sleeve.

Oddly enough...there are many things in life that I never thought I'd do, for reasons I can't actually remember I was opposed to them. Ten years ago, I'd have hit you in the face for suggesting I'd ever be a veteran of the Armed Forces. Ten years ago, I'd have refused to believe that I'd be a fan/rider/owner of motorcycles, ever. Similarly, I'd never have thought I'd become this much a tattooed freak on a leash. There are other ideals and tthoughts that I no longer hold onto, but that's for another time.

Centered around the summer of my 23rd birthday, a feeling that was eating me alive had reached a point I could no longer abide (the dude abides..heh). I was tired of feeling like an utter loser. I was sick of feeling like I had no path in front of me, and this feeling saturated so many areas of my life. I couldn't talk to women because, regardless of my personality, I believed I had nothing to bring to the table. And I wasn't yet ready for college, so I did the next best thing: join the Army to be all I can be.

*ssssiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh*

I'll talk about that more at a later date.

Motorcycles were simply a matter of safety. I thought they were too dangerous and really had no desire to risk my life on a 2-Wheeled Death Machine (that's for you Kakes)!

The Tattoos...are a much longer, and more positive story. I'll snap some pics and write a blog about them soon.

Day 34: Alien Death Ray!

No, "Alien Death Ray" is not the name of the indie, folk, ska, punk, rock-a-hippy, death metal rock band I'm not working on. I'm referring to (obviously) the death ray coming out of the source of red light in the picture.

A few seconds prior to hopping into bed, I donned a headlamp I picked up from Home Depot. Packed together with a set of five other flashlights, I don't imagine it was thought to end up a reading device, though why not?

Turning off my room light requires me to get out of bed. While I'm not really that lazy, getting out of bed at 2am (give or take) to turn off the light is torture. Not to mention, why light up an entire room when this small light does the job I require? Others have small nightstand lamps, but I do not. I'm more than okay using this funny lil' tool.

The red light requires a little adjustment, but what I'm most wary of is eye strain. Having used it for four nights in a row, I have yet to experience any strain or discomfort whatsoever.

Day 33: Untouched Angel

The day of the Snowpocalyptiarmageddon!!

Already bending my own rules of themes (hehe), I was on the porch letting our 9.5 pound dog dig it's way through a foot of snow and decided to do an experimental macro shot with my camera. This little angel just happened to be in an area of the porch oddly untouched by any snow or drifts. She got hit later on tough!!

I've ordered a new book to read through and learn a few things."The Digital Photography Book" by Scott Kelby. Photoshop is another project I want to pick up and tool around with here and there.

Day 32: Before the Snowpocalypse

Interesting....how rough shall this shot look tomorrow?

Really though, most of us are born and bred Michiganians! Dealing with snow should come to us as easily as breathing. A foot? Two feet?! Is this a problem?!

It's not an uncool pic, but not that cool either.