Shooting the shit with a homie this recent Sunday (at work), I captured him stretching himself out by hanging on a pipe at work. Curiously, I decided to attempt the same thing, only mildly fearful that my fat body self would cause my arms to be ripped out of socket by the weight of the rest of my fattiness.Of course, the arms-out-of-socket ripping was never an issue in the end, because I couldn't make the vertical jump to the pipe. So I did the next best thing: laid down, cried softly to myself, while cursing my general tendency to overeat, yet overeating at the same time. Funny how food materializes in front of fat kids as if teleported there by a Star Trek food replicator. You can barely have crumbs in the whole house, but a moment of sadness grips you and a pan of brownies appears if by magic.
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