Truly I wanted to punch this man in the face for being a fruit. I mean, really? Captain Jackson?! What sort of adversity do you find beyond trying to make this little hamlet not look so douchey in the eyes of others? Trying to prove that it's a snazzy place to live? Good luck on all counts.Not that Jackson really is such an absolutely horrible place to live, but c'mon dude...Captain Jackson?
Which leads me to my next point, that he needs a super villain. And I just so happen to have plotted for some time to be that super villain. Want to know my idea? I don't know....it's s'posed to be a secret. Okay, I'll tell you.
I have this image of a guy in a pin stripe suit, with excessive amounts of pink accents. I'll go around making fun of the abysmal levels of unemployment around Jackson and even hand out pink slips screaming "you're fired" to the masses.
This creation has a name too. This name, which will be spoken of with awe and reverence, and more than a dose of fear, will..........
PAPA PINK SLIP!!!
I'll jump out of the alley way on a cruise night, throw a pink slip at Captain Jackson, cackle diabolically, and say, "Ah HA Captain Jackson! It is I, your nemesis, Papa Pink Slip! Here to let you know that you, like a vast majority of the citizenry of Jackson, are worthless. In short: you're fired! Now, be off you to Michigan Works, in feeble hopes of improving yourself!"
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