Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Day 24: Just for you Amy, and maybe for me too.


There ya' go Amy. I looked long at the three photos we amassed, very concerned over the appearance of my chin/neck area. Not wanting to appear as an overly chubby individual, I was close to choosing the photo that made me look better and you worse. Not that you looked "bad," but there was definitely a deer-caught-in-the-headlights thing goin' on.

Oh, also Amy, I will embark upon a new series of bad parking job photos. At the onset of this project I was more focused on myself being in the photos, and didn't see a possibly of fitting myself into the photo along with the moronic parking jobs. However, the solution now seems so simple that I ought to punish myself for not having thought of it sooner. Excuse me while I retreat to my pleasure room and flog myself.

Not perhaps my oldest friend, but an oldie nonetheless. If memory serves, we didn't exactly have the most cordial of meetings early on. In fact, I remember my attitude towards you led me to exhibit some rudeness to your twin sister, a sister I'd go on to date for several years. Funny how things turn out.

Funny indeed how things turn out. During high school I had no major hopes and dreams. Immediately post high school, still I had no major hopes and dreams. Nearing age 23, I experienced my first of many apostrophes; this one discovering that I was indeed a loser and wouldn't date myself ever were I the most desperate person on Earth. Not that I had delusions of grandeur just yet, but I definitely had a fire burning my ass that needed to be extinguished, which led me to donning my Army greens and pretending to be Rambo at every chance permitted.

Fast forward to now. Before I move on, I wish I could interject sounds into my blogs so that as you read "fast forward" you heard the sound of a tape cassette being fast forwarded. C'mon, it hasn't been so long that you've forget that higher pitched, squiggly sound, has it?

Here I am at a point where a goal held for several years is not in question. In question because the path to that goal has been disrupted and it's likely I'll finish that goal elsewhere rather than at the original institution planned. Not only has my path been littered with some obstacles, but other pathways are now visible off in the distance. Not new choices at all, but rediscovered ones; ones long forgotten in lieu of a more sensible one.

Whether or not I embark upon those newly rediscovered paths, I can't say as of yet. "Difficult to see. Always in motion is the future;" the words of a lil' green man of some reknown, depending on your level of geekiness.

There have been other unexpected developments that I've talked about more extensively in the previous year's project, and will likely be discussed further in this year's project. Which brings me to a point:

I've enjoyed the random posting of self-portrait styled photos, but I need to alter it a bit. Not really alter it, but take more liberties. Every other day or so, I intend to write a monster blog of sorts. Something to keep myself writing more and more. These two and three line blogs were starting to bug me and I felt trapped in a way.

Ah well....Stay Tuned My Beloved Andy-Villians!!

Day 23: Funeral Day

Yes, I hate my neck in this shot, but it's the one I took so I'll deal. I wanted the pic to be in the church before I left, but in the procession out of the church, I completely forgot.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Day 22: Doin' the Snag

We ain't doin' the Creep. Oh no; we're doin' the Snag!! The Snag was not so much as invented, but made popular first with two wonderful ladies by the names of Annay and Batgirl.

Just because it's fun, doesn't mean it's cute. Vernie might be cute with her snag, but Phanny and I are not.

Day 21: Bath Time

The other day was bath day for the Verniss and the Ceez. It was also a hell of a stressful night, being one of Vernie's nights not at home in a year or two. I had to set my ass on the couch and lie with her to get her to sleep. Partly my own fault as I let her sleep in the bed with me at home.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Day 20: The Oddball Shots Are My Favorite!

Obie kaybie....I know what many of you are thinking. "We're sick and tired of the you and Phanny B pics! Give us something interesting!"

You're right. I do need to find more interesting stuff involving me to snap. Doing Yoga, perhaps. Or maybe getting a tattoo (yes, this will happen). How 'bout jumping on a roller coaster?! Yes, this too may happen. For the time, however, I'll only offer these lame ones; money is tight and I'm in a hell of a course load.

Day 19: Caes & Me

Not often will you find me trying to love up another dog as much I do Vernie...in fact I'm not even loving Caesar up at all. He's close to being killed next time he tries to lick my lips. I've raised my voice when he's done that, tapped him on the nose when he's done that, drop kicked him when he's done that, and even tazed him (that was funny to watch) when he's done that! Lil' bugger!!


Day 18: Dang that head is round!

Okay, so my ass was rocking out the Photo Booth application on my Mac. Still, her furry, lil' noggin' is pretty damn round right now. Very much in need of a good grooming, and a bath too. Might as well call her Stinketta Green.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Day 17: The Return of the Red Ray

Yesterday's pic was taken immediately after I turned off the bedroom light. The "Red Ray" is a product of me wearing a headlight, setting it to red (for reading) and going slow synchro flash on the camera. The red light makes for less strain on the eyes and overall less light in the room. Helps the chemicals shift so that I'm not awake all night.

Seems trivial this morning, really. So much seems trivial when you learn of the passing of someone you know, unless you wished for the death of that person. Believing that they're moving forward to a different place - hopefully a better, pain free place - doesn't really take the edge off the knowledge that they're gone. Death is, after all, a fact of life, but that doesn't make it any easier a pill to swallow.


Monday, January 16, 2012

Day 16: What's her problem?!

Damn Gina!! What's your beef?

Tell me, what is the most beautiful thing in this pic? Were you to guess the woman - yes, the one with the mean mug - you'd be close, but no cigar. The most beautiful thing, and I'm sure she'd agree with me, is the 27" iMac in the background. Such an amazingly awesome piece of machinery, it kinda turns me on. Phanny B's engines might not be revved up thinking about, but I know she gets a little drooly about it.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Day 15: Big Ass Robe!!

Y'all know me, then you know I love wearing a robe. In the way others love wearing jammies, I love wearing a robe around. It's like a high class snuggie. A big ass robe I wear too. Enough that I can wrap Phanny B and myself in it.


Saturday, January 14, 2012

Day 14: Yet Anudder Lame Last Minute Snap

Doing homework at Phanny B's. Yes, I can pull myself away from her, albeit with much kicking and screaming.

Day 13: Last Minute Snap

Just like last year, there will be those moments where I forget to take the pic until the very last minute of the day. This is one of those instances. Made even funnier that my ass was in bed, ready to give up the project so I wouldn't have to get up and find my camera just to snap this pic.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Day 12: Extra, Extra...

Extra, Extra, Read All About It! I Love Phanny And I'm Gonna Shout It!

For some time I've wanted one of these caps. News Boy or Driver style caps I think they call them. Doesn't matter really, I love it either way. A rose by any other name sort of concept. An early Burrfday gift from Phanny B, I might add.

What'chu think?


Day 11: Funny Faces

Making odd or funny faces is a hobby of mine. Actually, it's more than just a mere hobby; it's a passion. For children, family, friends, and often no reason at all. You'll find my ass chillin' in front of a mirror making all sorts of craziness, usually for the purpose of trying out new faces.

Flip up my hood, and I'll try and rock a sinister, maniacal face. Good shit, good shit. My mother hates it when I rock my horror face.

Of course, the face above isn't my horror face. It's just some stupid face I was making at Phanny B. Nothing special, except that it was for Phanny B.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Day 10: Good Friends, Great Friends: A Haiku

I love my three friends.
They are sources of great joy.
Without, I'm empty.

What'cha think? Another attempt maybe?

My friends are awesome.
They are pleasures of one's life.
Without friends, I am sad.

Not so profound, I admit, but it's a start. Granted it'll never be confused with the greatest Haikus of our time, but I dig.


Monday, January 9, 2012

Day 9: My Robe Shrank!!

What'cha think? Did my robe just shrink in the wash, or does that robe belong to someone else? I'll give you a hint: it's the latter option. Sexy it does not make me look, but I had to rock it for a quick photo op. I think I ruined it with the socks. Opinions on that? Maybe knee high would go better, since they hide my Wookie Hocks.

Day 8: So Sleepy!

Yes, I'm sleepy. Now what? And I even got sidetracked and forgot to snap a pic all day. I have a cold, I'm miserable and I would be willing to sell my soul in order to end my sniffle problems. So there!!!

Day 7: The White Hand of the Andy Man

Who am I to tell a damsel in distress no? Phanny B asked me to give her a little help in painting her place of business, to which I agreed to do so. Of course, there was a bit of shenanigans involved, as per our usual activities.

Hopefully they weren't the most expensive jeans in the world :/ hehehe


Day 6: Going Streaking?!?!

If I'm right, and I'd like to think that I am, you're rolling your eyes right now. Yes, I am wearing naught but a robe, flops, and jammie pants; and I'm in public no less.

Not that I'm wearing a pair of sweatpants mind you, though I have finally done that just recently. Even then, I'll only do that when certain criteria are met - as they were also met in the above pic: when I'm sick, desperate for food, and/or super hungover. Even when those criteria have been met, you won't find me at a decent restaurant or at the mall or even at Target. Well, maybe Target, but that's dependent on dire my need for Sniffle spray.

Having only minutes ago posted the pic on Facebook, a friend comments, "are you going streaking?" Not in Jackson, but don't give me any ideas I think to myself ;D

Friday, January 6, 2012

Day 5: Phanny Beau Got Warhol'ed!!

Some of my very favorite shots of Phanny and I are of the two of us making super silly faces. Even if it's just one of us (usually me) making the silly face, that's cool. It still ends up looking quite a bit better than a shot of me trying to look good. The aptitude to take a good photo was not given to me by the Gods.

This was taken via my Macbook Pro (if you don't know, now you know...ninja) and the Photobooth application. If you pay attention to my Facebook then you may have seen a video pop up with the two of us sharing a tender moment, however altered our faces were by Photobooth.

Now, I'm gonna take my ass to the couch and chill. Maybe imbibe some super hot liquids to make my froat feel better, and then a nap...perhaps.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Day 4: Game On!!!

Yes, I'm aware that I look a touch psychotic here, but I'm ready for blood. Fortunately, it's the blood of well blended pixels and sprites. And what a stress reliever it is, Call of Duty. Headset is on, controller warm and my killing buddy in party chat. Like the title says...."GAME ON!"


Day 3: Phanny & Beau were here

This wasn't the original photo snapped at all, but a Phanny Photoshop Special. Tellin' ya', the girl is a damn magician with anything artsy. The title of the post is inspired by the old "Kilroy Was Here" character popularized God only knows when. Sure, you can look it up if you want, but it's not important I suppose. It just makes me laugh to see us making funny faces :D

Day 2: An Exhausted Sith

After an endless day of...sleeping, I was still exhausted after arriving home. I rocked out The Robe, of course, and set down for a night of nothing. Not enough energy to do anything ;p

Day 1: Prepping the Green Demon!

Phanny B knows just what I mean. Finding a questionable looking Vietnamese/Thai place to eat, we ordered a plate of green curry chicken with noodles to share. Ordering it extra spicy seemed like a bomb ass idea at the time, but later on that night, I took a wicked number 2. So bad that I swore I was giving birth to an unholy, green demon. It even burnt a little....but not badly enough to not order it again the next night.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Andy's 365(+1) of '12 Explanation

Greetings and Salutations my Andy-Villians!! As I've said in my previous blog, "another book closes so another can open." As one project ends so shall another begin. Yes, Andy is going through it all again, but this time will be a bit different and significantly less time consuming.

Previous project involved posting a photo a day and a small (or less small) blog to go with the pic of choice. The blogging was both my favorite and most problematic part of the whole she-bang. Instead, I'll collect a week's worth of self-involved photos - meaning I will be in the photos, not always the main subject - and post them at the end of the week. Instead of each photo being the inspiration for it's own write up, I'll do a week's end blog for the whole set, maybe. Each photo will have a one-liner title, a brief description if you will. Perhaps I'll do a blog per day, just minimizing the amount of writing. Hmm...

Also, I'll be posting both on www.blogger.com and www.wordpress.com for a time, which will expose me to using a site I find appealing as the reader. If I hate it, then I hate and I will end my use of it.

Read on if you so desire, and don't if you don't so desire. No offense taken, but it could be fun coffee reading. Expect my usual level of wit and satire, peppered with the certain examples of eloquently using the word "fuck."

'Til next time my Andy-villians!!!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Day 365: Last Day of the Year


Well now....it's been a hell of a year, hasn't it? Truth be told, I felt much like the photo above; stuck in traffic with only a small amount of wiggle room. I'm still moving forward, but at a crawl, not at all at the posted speed limit. For much of the year, my hands have been tied by highly unfortunate circumstances out of my control, and other circumstances within my control. In that regard, many of the past year's problems are of my own crafting. Furthermore, never has the saying, "my own worst enemy" been better exemplified.

Anxiety has been the worst of my issues in the past year. Panic attacks have been a very regular occurrence. Even the awesome pleasure of friends had, at times, not appealed to me in the slightest. Mental breakdowns were had a plenty, the most infuriating being the ones experienced in front of others.

However, despite the intense wave of misgivings accompanying the past year, there have been rays of hope. Friends have managed to drag me out of my funk on more than one occasion. Even family has provided respite from my mood. My small little pup, Vernie, has been a near constant source of happiness that has kept me grounded. Can't forget Bareman's Chocolate Milk; Bareman's has been an unconditional source of pleasure. And there were...other developments, unforeseen, that took away the constant sense that the clouds were opened up and God was saying, "I hate you Andy Beau!"

Phanny B has been one of the most interesting developments of the year ;)

One of my earlier decisions was to avoid getting into a relationship during my time in school. Enough time was spent with distractions during all the years leading up to my reentry into academia, that I didn't want to risk losing focus on school. More so, I didn't want to have to choose between the two, when issues of time management confronted me. Fear that I'd make the wrong decision in that situation was too strong. Of course, it doesn't help that I feel as though several of my failed relationships were my fault.

During the summer, Phanny (Stephany) made herself known to me. Fortunately, I couldn't ignore her either. During our time together, she's placed herself right up there with Bareman's and Vernie, which is saying a lot (heh heh). Yes, indeed, a Coffee Company romance was in the making.

Had you have asked me what my plans were for New Year's Eve even two months ago, I'd have told you that it likely would have involved drinking too much with friends. Imagination then wouldn't have conceived the possibility that I'd be spending it in Chicago with a woman I've grown to *hate* more than should be allowed. Never would I thought I'd be this happy, especially after the year's turn of events.

Truth be told, I'm not entirely happy, at least not yet. Many habits were thrown up as defense mechanisms that will take some time to knock down. When once again I can say that traffic has begun to pick up, when my life has again began moving forward at a speed discernible as more than a crawl, then my heart will be more whole. Then I can truly celebrate a return to my one time optimism. The fireworks of my mind and heart will be as bright as I desire, and as warm as Phanny deserves from a guy who loves her. Then will I feel as if I deserve her, and that she's receiving what she deserves.

With much anticipation, I draw this 365 project to a close. Like the creator's life it centered around, it was filled with errors and hardship. However, as with life, it was a trial; a test that was for me and me alone. To start something and finish it was the real purpose behind the project. I'll embark upon a new, altered project, but something similar in nature. The writing will be reduced to minimize the tendency to fall behind.

Thanks go to anyone who may have been featured in the photos. Thanks to anyone who read the blogs - no matter how few or how many the words there may have been. The usual thanks for the people surrounding me that have been inspiration in life, not just in the blog. Special Kudos go to Bareman's, Vernie, and, of course, Phanny B. Thanks be to God for creating me, Mike Ditka for giving me the will to live, and George Michael for being caught in the that bathroom letting people know that Pee Wee Herman isn't the only sick fuck in public.

No thanks will be given to the following:
Midgets
Mormons
Mormon Midgets
Snakes
Makers of chocolate milk other than Bareman's.
Lindsay Lohan

Forgive me if I forgot to shit on someone's feelings that I should have.

I'd really like to continue dragging on. The idea of being finished with it is really quite saddening. Another book closes so another can open, I suppose. Move onto the next big thing.

Love, Peace and Bacon Grease!!!

P.S. Special Thanks go out to the matriarch of the Kline Klan, Jamie Kline. Great friend and wonderful partner in the wild ride that has been this project. Without your dual participation, I might have failed. Much Love....(can't believe I forgot your ass! I ought to be tazed)



Day 364: Funny Faces! :D

Once again, I found that I left my camera away from my body (in the hotel room to be specifically) and decided to borrow this photo from Phanny B.

Gotta love the goofy photos we can create. To be honest, they're almost my favorites we snap.

Day 363: My Poor Little Canon

"Everything that has a beginning has an end..."

Starting this project off with a myriad of goals, I didn't really know where it would go and what I'd get out of it. At one point I thought, perhaps, that I'd embrace it and take an artistic interest in the photography, which I have, but I haven't exactly acted on that.

Main goal was to take a photo a day, or several photos and choose from those; that photo would then be posted and a minor story, or description concerning or inspired by the photo in question. However, the writing has concurrently been the best part and most troubling aspect of this 365 day endeavor.

Via the writing that goes with each of these blogs, I have began rediscovering my literary voice. Through finding that voice I have once again come to enjoy writing. Now I feel as if I can hold my own against the writers/journalists/bloggers out there that I have admired and respected. And if not hold my own, then exercise my ability and adapt through practice and further learning. In this way, the writing has become my favorite aspect of this project.

On the other side of the coin, the writing has become the major thorn in my side. Because each of the photos must be posted along with a story, as per my own rule, the project has become time consuming. So time consuming that I found myself holding off posting several days at a time, for a point - usually during the weekend when I had a bit more free time. It was a matter of prioritizing, but it ended up becoming too regular a practice, a practice that would eventually end up screwing me and throwing off my count far too many times. In recent months, for example, I've found myself several weeks behind, then I'd rush to catch up and get stuff under control. Rushing things, I'd start shorting my descriptions and stories. As RobRob might have put it, I was "barely trying."

However, I want to continue writing and doing the photo project. Which I will continue doing, but not together; at least I won't continue doing it on the same magnitude at which I attempted on this project. The writing will live on, but in a different form. The photography will also continue, but it will be a more traditional 365 photo project.

Jamie Kline said it best, when she soothed my irritations by stating the project should be more flexible than I tried to make it out to be. The rules, she also said, are only as rigid as we make them.

As I once again start a new 365 Day Project, I'll be more flexible with the rules. In a few days I'll post a blog being more descriptive of my photo project, which I may or may not post through Blogger. A friend has utilized a Wordpress, which I may look at over the next few days.

The photo above is of the camera that bore the brunt of my project's photography. For a time I kept the camera safely within it's protective case from which I would remove it for each photo op. This became a pain in the ass, ergo I began just tossing it in my pocket. You can see quite a few nicks and scratches on the camera, and I'm sure it's due for one hell of a cleaning.